Measure twice, cut once...

I started preparing for my next promotion the day I got promoted. I never thought anything of it. It was a natural and logical progression.


When I was younger, I never understood why my dad did some of the things he did. Why he worked Saturdays when he didn't have to or why he never took sick days and was always like an hour early to everything. I never understood his random sayings. I always overlooked the value of his words and even his actions as I was growing up.


 I realized the day I got promoted that the way my father acted made sense. All the things he used to do and say had shaped me. All the things that annoyed me were exactly what I needed to hear.


   I was raised to always be 15 steps ahead of everyone and 100% certain I always got it right. Rely on confidence, accuracy and will. He raised me in a way where it was hard to be caught me slipping. Hard to fail. Always early and always overly prepared. Taught to avoid mistakes and unexpected circumstances.
 
    Never taught to better than everyone, but taught to take advantage of every aspect that I could feasibly control. To be better than uncertainty and better than accidents and anomalies. Raised to be better than any excuses. Raised me to eliminate the people that didn't come ready to play, or the people that didn't show up an hour early or were too lazy to check their work.


    My dad let me know that it was ok to fail sometimes, but it was NEVER acceptable to produce things that were not your absolute best. I used to show up to training at Stan ready to give everything. Not just because that's what it took to be a starter, but mainly because there was no point in doing it if I wasn't going to fully give myself to it. If I wasn't gunna show up and make people remember me, then there was no point in being there.


My life is good. I've made some good choices, worked hard and been successful, but at the end of the day I'll never take credit for more than I deserve. I won't take credit for having the privilege of being raised right. For growing up with two parents and love and safety. For being pushed by people that didn't have to push me. For people who encouraged me to be better than I ever thought I actually could be.


 I grew up and was raised the right way. I was given examples of how to hustle and be hungry. Examples like my father showed me and made sure I knew that I had to be better. I had to be earlier. Fitter. Stronger. Smarter. So I'm very thankful to the people that knew my potential before I did. No one has ever believed in me more than my father.

Ki'tay D. Davidson

Emotion can be the most exhausting feeling your body can take on. The act of dealing with emotion, causes more exertion on my body than any physical pain I have ever felt. There is no expiration on grief and we are forced to deal with loss and disappointment until our heart can become freed from it, which in some cases may never happen.


Tomorrow is the anniversary of the day we loss an incredible man, Ki'tay Davidson. I didn't know Ki'tay personally, but I am touched by the power and love he left this earth with. From Ki'tay and the people who loved him, I have learned how important it is to be conscious. I learned to understand the interconnectivity of  everyone on this earth and the power of our interdependence. I've come to realize that the dreams and demands of the groups we identify with are all somehow connected to each other. We are all asking for the same things. The same freedoms(Black, Foreign, LGBT, Women, Disabled). My ability to do better for this world is based on my consciousness and love. For that I can still connect to Ki'tay Davidson, even he is no longer with us.


I've come to know the beauty in diversity and disability, and for that I am thankful.


#Justice2050