I find the relationship between men and women to be very intriguing. The desires that both parties harness, especially in my generation, is certainly worthy of processing. It's like everyone is trying to get something out of someone else, while still trying to grow up, find themselves and figure out what it is that they even want in the first place.
The idea of us, say those under 35ish, attempting intimacy, falling in and out of love, having passionate or non-passionate sex, whatever it is.
The idea of us trying to find ourselves in someone else, through temporary or even long term fulfillment, is almost comical. I realize that we've heard this before, but the truth is, that casual sex is really so much more than we are making it.
On one hand, it can be a medium for satisfying natural hormones, which is fine, but on the other, it can simply be an attempt to temporarily satisfy the ways of the world. It can be a way for you to escape from your problems like drugs, or even worse, a way for you to build yourself back up, from a previous partner that broke you down before.
On one hand drugs are ok and I presume that they're fun as long you keep them in control, but you see sex is different. Sex, when used for the wrong reasons, almost always fails tremendously. It gets so intertwined with you emotions and who you are as a person, along with who and where you want to be, that it simply cannot be controlled.
You may be having sex because you want so badly to fit in, or to emulate the relationship that your happily married friends have. Maybe in that moment that you begin to take your clothes off you feel irreplaceable. Like your body is so much more beautiful than it was before you started. Maybe your ability to have sex with whomever whenever you choose is the only sense of security and control you have in your life. Maybe you want a baby, or to be loved, or just an easier way to fall asleep that night. Maybe this is just a chance for you to satisfy you hormones, or you're on your period or drunk or just giving in to what your body what is calling for. All in all, at the end of the day or night, all of the reasons I stated, stem at the onset of something like lust or a lack of self control or self confidence. They all stem from mediums that attempt to fulfill themselves through sex, but almost always fall short.
You see, my point is not to say that sex is bad and you should necessarily wait til' marriage. To each their own, but my point is to mention that these desires and mediums that we acquire are not necessarily innate to who we are. Maybe, the majority of them stem from men watching too many hip hop and R&B videos. From girls re-pinning too many wedding ideas or spending too much time watching The Bachelor. Maybe these mediums come from constantly monitoring who went from "in a relationship" to "engaged", or women and men only going out and putting on their best when they need attention. I am guilty of these things myself, so this is not to say that I am by any means above it. But it is to say that we continue to direct our motives based on social media and entertainment. That we alter our actions accordingly, and may or may not suffer from it later on. We continue to attempt to acquire something from a place where it does not exist. This action, after time, can go from being fun, to sad, to devastating and then just stupid.
These ages, and these actions come at such an impressionable time, and its so much grander than casual sex and a good time. Don't get me wrong, I am a big believer in getting it while u can. I believe that sex is beautiful, and although I chose to abstain, I believe that you should do what is best for you and what makes u happy.
I think that love is actually everything it is cracked up to be, and thats why people are weird and high strung about it. I believe that it is really worth fighting for and it is worth the risk. That every once in a while its also worth some discernment and some patience. I think that sex is worth holding on to and sometimes worthy of more than someone that is just average or casual.
Sometimes the things you want the most to happen don't and then what you least expect to happen does. You meet thousands of people and none of them really touch you. And then you meet one person, one in a crowd of thousands, and your life is changed forever. The only time this is an issue is if you have already given everything you have away. If you've wasted it all on trials and the people that came before, then sadly enough you may not have anything left to give.
My only thoughts to some is to beware of diluting the true and only wealth they have to offer.
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